In My Essence

i look into the mirror 

my reflection holds layers.

the hazy masks,

just fuzzy echoes

of what used to 

hold me back.

no shame on you, masks

no blame.

just a thank you 

for your attempt to keep me safely

away from pain.

i honor your plight

and i also choose to set you aside

to feel the pain 

and the things i can't explain 

in words,

in simple sentences that contain

a tightly knit meaning.

instead

i choose 

to lay myself bare,

speak in poetry

where the meaning 

drifts 

like air

that has to be breathed in 

and felt.

many people won't understand,

won't track

with these wisps of words 

that create a path

to an expanse 

of intense feelings.

i choose to break myself open,

let my stained glass creations

flow 

from my deepest desire

to make beauty 

in the midst of dark destruction.

i choose to build stories

from the ideas in my mind

that are irreverent and sensual, 

and unabashedly 

wild.

my masks say

i'll feel alone.

unheard. 

misunderstood.

but i know 

that when i speak in my own

language

when i live from my heart and soul

that i'm content 

and i feel whole.

i look into the mirror and see, 

accept,

and choose,

to live...

in   

my 

essence.